Mr. Perfect

This is my response to some girl randomly emailing me then Mr. Perfect getting mad because I asked him a question that he took as an accusation.

 Ok let me explain something to u then the ball is in your court.  See you are my knight in shining armor..... my prince charming.... my happily ever after.  Ive loved u sooo much for so long that In my mind I have created this entire fairy tale of what my life would be if you had married me instead of Angela.  Kat calls it my snow globe ;) because no matter how dark and depressing reality is in the place in my mind where you've lived things are perfect in the place in my heart where u live no matter how sad I am is warm and happy...

 OMG I hope this doesnt sound to crazy...

 N in this "snow globe fairy tale" you are completely perfect. We are completely perfect. Our life together is perfect. Now that Ive  found u  and you love me as much as I love you that fairy tale is coming true... With the reality that neither of us is perfect which is ok because we are human... With the reality that we are really far apart which is super hard. With the reality that our relationship isnt perfect- we have disagreements and even get mad or upset.  (I had completely forgotten our anger issues bumping heads lol) but thats ok too because I still love you maybe even more because u love me and except me with all my imperfections.

 But there are times when the line between the snow globe and reality is fuzzy because you make me so happy.    Last night was one of those times.  The question was just a realty check.  In my head you are mine and only mine without outside interference. In reality my mind Is programmed to assume the negative in everything.  Its kinda like and angel and a devil sitting on your shoulder.  The devil saying u big dummy he wont claim u, he wont let u claim him, shining a flash light n all the little questions (which are just my insecurities), Your just living in that stupid snow globe why would he love u? Why would he want to be with you?.....  Then the Angel says He love's you, He makes you smile, He brings you Joy, and you do the same for him.  You are soul mates.  Things may not be perfect yet but they will be.....

And as for trust remember Im trying to relearn that lol because my mind has been trained to assume everything  people say is bs.  I trust you because I want to, because I choose to. Not because its the natural response. Thats why I ask for honesty.  N a difficult truth is much better than bs because it can be worked through.  I really just want to be able to not doubt or question anything u say.   N dont go all mad ass on me Im not saying you lied to me  about anything Im just giving u a glimps into my head.

I also need u to know that you can be 100% honest with me even if it might hurt.  Its not going to change how I feel about you.  I have made a conscience decision that anything that you do that I might not like while Im 300 mile away has nothing to do with your love for me.  Now dont get it twisted that is not a green light to screw someone..... I will most likely throw a bitch fit if u do!  But only out of fear that someone will steal ur heart. What Im saying is I will ride through all the bs with u just dont bs me. I Love you unconditionally and I want u to feel comfortable talking to me about all the bs. I promise to not be judgmental.

N from this point forward I hope that I can ask questions if and when I have them without you getting angry and defensive like its an accusation.  Some times I just need affirmation, clarification, or confirmation.

Some how I feel like most of this is the same for you, well minus the snow globe lol.